I didn't know that I have lost my sense of smell until towards hospital discharge when doc tested me.
Still remember during hospital intake, I replied the consultant doc that I have no problem smelling when he queried, after stating that the part of my brain that got hurt was right above my nose...
Still remember my wondering of why the revolving liquid air freshener in my hubby's car didn't emit any smell...
But I don't wonder when I got into his car and didn't smell any thinner or weird smell - which was quite typical of his profession ;)
And certainly never question if the current haze-infested environment carries with it smell of burnt or soot, whatever you wanna call that.
Once, I caught myself walking near those 'walking chimneys' (aka. smokers) just to see if I can smell their cigarettes. No, I couldn't. And quite silly, actually. Just b'cos I can't smell it doesn't mean my lung will also reject their toxic, yea? Have stopped doing that since. Would rather do other kinds of tests... Like smell the coffee I make for my hubby every morning? Sounds good...
Still, I thank God that more of the time, I am blessed that I can't smell - for now - cos I have 'escaped' more of the bad smell than miss out on good ones... Nowadays, I put on perfume for the sake of others, no longer myself...
Despite of all these, my BIG THANKSGIVING to God is: He watches over me. One day during my MC period, I was boiling some tonic in the kitchen whilst at the same time surfing the net in my room. Was quite shocked when I return to the kitchen to discover that there were no flames at all though the gas switch was on! Must be the wind (I stay near the sea) and the window I left opened unknowingly (and quite unusally whenever I cook). Thank God for His protection, cos I definitely never smell a rat or anything unusual...
For now, I just gotta remind myself to fix my mind on the good report (from ABOVE!). The British doc told me some may regain their sense of smell while some may not; a friend's nerologist said it will come back; the chinese doc said it will come back too. Well, majority said yes and I should be comforted. Sometimes, being a persimist weights me down but I'm just gonna put my confidence in what God says - that I am whole and well. He has already completed the work - exchanged His health and wholeness for sickness and pain at the calvary.
Amen to that. I received.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Ward 10A, Bed 28
Would think that most of you have guessed it right... Ward 10A, Bed 28 was my address for some recent past 3 days. Am glad to be out breathing fresh air.. even though lately the skies have been infested with the Indo haze... Anyway, I have not been able to smell anything though it was said that the breeze at times smelt of burnt.
The Big Question: What Happen?
Brain contulsion. That was my diagnosis. I actually went on with daily life without knowing that I have been suffering from a 'bruise' in my frontal brain.
No wonder the headaches were especially bad and so persistent...
No wonder I have dizziness for so long...
No wonder my appetite is lacking... and sometimes felt nauseous
No wonder food tasted so bland...
No wonder I feel tired so easily... and struggle to function at my optimum at work...
Just don't feel myself so finally decided to see a doc - again, and doc referred me do a brain scan...
The polyclinic doc I saw during the first time gave me painkillers and some anti-nauseous medicine, despite of the account I have related to him. I guess he, like most people, thought mine were the typical after-effects of hangover. Initially, I thought so too, but just couldn't quite swallow the bit that I am so lousy, given that I have down more potent stuff previously and never got drunk. Anyway, for the record, I ain't a regular drinker. It was a colleague's farewell that my boss (who is close to his 50s but I guess, young at heart!) suggested going to MOS (not the Japanese chain Mos burger but nightspot Ministry Of Sound). I was not very for the venue, though I don't mind going to the zhi-chai dinner run by the other colleague's parents. Nevertheless, I was a little curious about the place on why the hype over it and also the part abt music which is my love. My other half was not keen at all for me to go, regardless of whether he comes along. Waste of money - that's his primary reason. Ok, so I decided not to go and told my boss. He understood though I could sense his disappointment, as another colleague also 'back out'. When the day comes however, my other half called up to say he can't meet me due to some urgent work; he asked me to "find my own programme". Means what? Out of some pressure from colleagues and my curiosity, I went along, since the time he finish work will coincide with the time I leave.
Did have some good time with the games we played while waiting for others to hit the dance floor. Other than that, there was nothing fantastic actually. Good concept they have but music wise... at least for the 'room' I was in, it was no good. How on earth will pple be enticed to dance with such music? Had some alcoholic drinks, danced for little bit, then left earlier with another colleague. Both of us were kinda just patronizing our boss and senior colleagues, you see... good to give face lor... We don't seem to have very valid reason unlike the colleague who opt out.
I took a 10 min walk to the nearest MRT station and took the train to the specified MRT where my other half would pick me up as agreed at the taxi stand. I didn't see him at the taxi stand though.
........
The next thing I know, I awakened on my bed, feeling the hurts at the back of my head. There were 3 bumps! Should be blue-blacks.. Wonder why?! And very bad headaches, can be said the worst I ever experience. Then I suddenly remember that I FORGOT to take out my contact lenses! I SLEPT WITH MY LENSES ON!!! Still blurring, I arose and walked to the toilet, only to find that my lenses have been well kept in its places. Hmm... I asked my hubby. He took out my lenses for me? Unthinkable! No, he didn't; Some of the things he told me was truly incredulous... I took my lenses out myself? I changed into my sleep wear myself? I kept asking him the same qn over and over again? And this I did, that I did? How come I don't recall? Thought it was quite funny eventually. Must be the hangover. Wished there is some sort of video where I could see how he carried me from the ground back to home and what happen after that. I learnt later that he didn't carry me; he woked me up and I walked back to his car - which I certainly don't recall. A bit scary, come to think of that... Just quietly give thanks that God's protection was over me and it was my hubby who found me lying on the ground, unconscious, not anyone else...
My Blood Pressure
It's strange that there wasn't any warning signals before my collapse that night. My blood pressure level tends towards to low side but have never shown its ugly head to such an extent. The last time it was really bad was when I exercised too vigoriously when I haven't been exercising consistently prior to that. The boxercise trainer did the standard warm up and cool down but it wasn't sufficient for me, taking into consideration the intensity. As the punches and kicks slowed down, I felt my muscles numbing, head blacking out and more discomfort. Never felt that way since a long, long time ago. Tk God that came on during the cooling down period and the exercise came to a stop then. I felt so terrible that I stooped, then eventually sat down before recovering in 5 min. Was not even able to response to a friend who came by to talk. Almost felt bad for being somewhat rude. That friend didn't follow up either.
ê Day i don on ê Green Robe
The 2nd doc I went to referred me to the NeuroScience Department in one of the hospitals. I was not quite expecting that I would need to go to A&E and even be warded! It appeared that appointments were tight and the clinic assistant saw that I needed attention earlier that she referred me to A&E (my head was stealing some rest from the pillar when I answered her that I injured my head).
Was still not ready to be warded as I felt it was too exaggerating! I'm here for a scan only! The attending doc recommended me to ward as the descriptions of some of my bodily experiences were alarm symptoms. If I opt to be outpatient and return on the next available date, I need to sign some indemnity. And the next available date could be as late as 2 wks later!!
Ok, might as well get it done once and for all. After all, I was assured that the doc will assess me the same evening and so on.
I felt real strange semi-lying on a hospital bed while the doc typed in my details into his PC. Felt even stranger when the bed I was on was later being pushed by another staff from behind. I am really in hospital! Later, I had my first taste of having a needle poked into my vein. And that thing stayed there for the next 3 days. Eeek....
As I was being assured of a bed place (in that populated hospital) and being pushed to my ward, I felt as though I was in one of those dramas... In A&E, pple really tend to walk faster as well.
After i was being 'parked' at my ward and bed, another nurse placed the green pajamas patients are to wear on my bed end. I changed into it - after 2 hrs + after reconfirming with the nurse that I really need to wear that. ok, perhaps it still haven't sink in yet into me then... I know I can't escape, since probably no docs in their right minds will administer scans for anyone in civilian wear.
The ScanS... and Tests..
It was not 1 scan but 3 scans I went thru. Quite an experience... CT, MRI, EEG - now not only I know from the textbook I used to study but have also acquired practical knowledge... in some sense... Was quite worried abt the expenses that could arise from the scans initially. The 'lightening up' (jardon used by doc) was at the frontal lobe of my brain, right above my nose, though it was the back of my head that hit the ground. The doc went on to do another test the next day and it was really, really gruelling... My face almost wrinked as I typed this... Lumbar Puncture - extraction of brain fluid from my spine. Terrifying, right??! The first doc gave up on me after a few attempts; said I was too tense. I say she was too rough and hard on my spine! of course, i didn't verbalise it. She called for another doc and he was more assuring and affirmative. Did it. My first time experiencing how GA felt like.. And the next worse thing was that I gotta lie flat on my back for the next 6 hours. Gosh!! I have never watch TV for so long continually until that day. Can't sleep too as I tend to turn and toss. I received compassion from some nursing assistants, of which some say 4 hrs is good enough, some say have to die die fulfill 6 hrs...
Feels like ER
For those who watch the english drama ER, a scene where docs and nurses talked among themselves quickly and excitedly as they worked on the patient in the operating theatre was common. It happened exactly after my LP was done. I heard sayings like "This is the first in Singapore..."; "Let's send it down before 3..."; "...gotta spin it round", etc. I asked what was all that abt and even if "first in Singapore" means I am some sort of guinea pig?? NO, no, the doc reassured. It was just a new and the first in Singapore high-tech machine the hospital purchased and my sample would be the first to be tested; it's more accurate than the naked eye's observation, as done in the past. *whew* ok, that don't sounds so bad...
Thanksgiving
Though a hospital stay is less than desired, I certainly thank God for the visits and care shown by many during this period, however short it may be. On top of his usual role as my driver, my hubby became delivery man as well, bringing me stuff I requested for nightly. Most family members have shown assuring support as well. Even remote church members also came visiting (i call that remote as these friends are not from my church, neither the former church I attended).
And of course the FREE upgrade! I opted for the lower end ward as it is within govt subsidy. However, due to lack of beds there, I was given upgrade to a higher ward which includes TV and aircon!! That's a savings of $100~ per day! And the 'space' I occupied was the only spot that has a window in the room, which was actually quite breathtaking... Tk God for such loving care He shown me.
Interesting sms
From my 10 over year good friend -> "how long is your 'holiday' there?"
From a mutual jovial friend my hubby and I know -> "what happen 2 u? is it (my hubby's name) knock yr head against wall?"
From a young friend whom I have emailed before hospitalisation abt my intention to perm my hair -> "ok.. i will pray for u.. what happen? i only heard tat u wan to do something to ur hair.. how come end up, u injure ur head/brain..? it mus be a long story, rite..."
From a colleague who learnt of my LP ordeal and how it was carried out -> "Aiyo, sound scary. Pls take care n rest well."
From my hubby, in response to my remarks abt the less than desired sounds made by 'Darth Vader' neighbour patient when I was having meals -> "remove her mask and she will no longer make any noise." (btw, the term 'Darth Vader' was coined by my bro to describe that patient's breathing and sometimes phlegm sounds; none of my doings)
Of course, there were some other touching and heartwarming smses as well. My tks and heartfelt appreciation to all of you who have prayed for me, visited me, called me, and bought stuff for me, yes, even crackers and tihbits!
Will need to go for a review scan and consultation in the coming mths. Meanwhile, now that I am discharged and resting at home for a while, I just wanna believe that these persistent dizzyness, appetite lack, food bland taste, proneness to fatigue and headache will go away completely and sooner than the few mths it takes for the affected part of my brain to recover. Supposed to be a few mths. Hmm... and certainly hope my sense of smell can return. Moving on, I'll just have to gradually start my regular cardio workout in order to improve my blood pressure level. And ha.. certainly not take alcoholic drinks as freely as I used to in the past.
The Big Question: What Happen?
Brain contulsion. That was my diagnosis. I actually went on with daily life without knowing that I have been suffering from a 'bruise' in my frontal brain.
No wonder the headaches were especially bad and so persistent...
No wonder I have dizziness for so long...
No wonder my appetite is lacking... and sometimes felt nauseous
No wonder food tasted so bland...
No wonder I feel tired so easily... and struggle to function at my optimum at work...
Just don't feel myself so finally decided to see a doc - again, and doc referred me do a brain scan...
The polyclinic doc I saw during the first time gave me painkillers and some anti-nauseous medicine, despite of the account I have related to him. I guess he, like most people, thought mine were the typical after-effects of hangover. Initially, I thought so too, but just couldn't quite swallow the bit that I am so lousy, given that I have down more potent stuff previously and never got drunk. Anyway, for the record, I ain't a regular drinker. It was a colleague's farewell that my boss (who is close to his 50s but I guess, young at heart!) suggested going to MOS (not the Japanese chain Mos burger but nightspot Ministry Of Sound). I was not very for the venue, though I don't mind going to the zhi-chai dinner run by the other colleague's parents. Nevertheless, I was a little curious about the place on why the hype over it and also the part abt music which is my love. My other half was not keen at all for me to go, regardless of whether he comes along. Waste of money - that's his primary reason. Ok, so I decided not to go and told my boss. He understood though I could sense his disappointment, as another colleague also 'back out'. When the day comes however, my other half called up to say he can't meet me due to some urgent work; he asked me to "find my own programme". Means what? Out of some pressure from colleagues and my curiosity, I went along, since the time he finish work will coincide with the time I leave.
Did have some good time with the games we played while waiting for others to hit the dance floor. Other than that, there was nothing fantastic actually. Good concept they have but music wise... at least for the 'room' I was in, it was no good. How on earth will pple be enticed to dance with such music? Had some alcoholic drinks, danced for little bit, then left earlier with another colleague. Both of us were kinda just patronizing our boss and senior colleagues, you see... good to give face lor... We don't seem to have very valid reason unlike the colleague who opt out.
I took a 10 min walk to the nearest MRT station and took the train to the specified MRT where my other half would pick me up as agreed at the taxi stand. I didn't see him at the taxi stand though.
........
The next thing I know, I awakened on my bed, feeling the hurts at the back of my head. There were 3 bumps! Should be blue-blacks.. Wonder why?! And very bad headaches, can be said the worst I ever experience. Then I suddenly remember that I FORGOT to take out my contact lenses! I SLEPT WITH MY LENSES ON!!! Still blurring, I arose and walked to the toilet, only to find that my lenses have been well kept in its places. Hmm... I asked my hubby. He took out my lenses for me? Unthinkable! No, he didn't; Some of the things he told me was truly incredulous... I took my lenses out myself? I changed into my sleep wear myself? I kept asking him the same qn over and over again? And this I did, that I did? How come I don't recall? Thought it was quite funny eventually. Must be the hangover. Wished there is some sort of video where I could see how he carried me from the ground back to home and what happen after that. I learnt later that he didn't carry me; he woked me up and I walked back to his car - which I certainly don't recall. A bit scary, come to think of that... Just quietly give thanks that God's protection was over me and it was my hubby who found me lying on the ground, unconscious, not anyone else...
My Blood Pressure
It's strange that there wasn't any warning signals before my collapse that night. My blood pressure level tends towards to low side but have never shown its ugly head to such an extent. The last time it was really bad was when I exercised too vigoriously when I haven't been exercising consistently prior to that. The boxercise trainer did the standard warm up and cool down but it wasn't sufficient for me, taking into consideration the intensity. As the punches and kicks slowed down, I felt my muscles numbing, head blacking out and more discomfort. Never felt that way since a long, long time ago. Tk God that came on during the cooling down period and the exercise came to a stop then. I felt so terrible that I stooped, then eventually sat down before recovering in 5 min. Was not even able to response to a friend who came by to talk. Almost felt bad for being somewhat rude. That friend didn't follow up either.
ê Day i don on ê Green Robe
The 2nd doc I went to referred me to the NeuroScience Department in one of the hospitals. I was not quite expecting that I would need to go to A&E and even be warded! It appeared that appointments were tight and the clinic assistant saw that I needed attention earlier that she referred me to A&E (my head was stealing some rest from the pillar when I answered her that I injured my head).
Was still not ready to be warded as I felt it was too exaggerating! I'm here for a scan only! The attending doc recommended me to ward as the descriptions of some of my bodily experiences were alarm symptoms. If I opt to be outpatient and return on the next available date, I need to sign some indemnity. And the next available date could be as late as 2 wks later!!
Ok, might as well get it done once and for all. After all, I was assured that the doc will assess me the same evening and so on.
I felt real strange semi-lying on a hospital bed while the doc typed in my details into his PC. Felt even stranger when the bed I was on was later being pushed by another staff from behind. I am really in hospital! Later, I had my first taste of having a needle poked into my vein. And that thing stayed there for the next 3 days. Eeek....
As I was being assured of a bed place (in that populated hospital) and being pushed to my ward, I felt as though I was in one of those dramas... In A&E, pple really tend to walk faster as well.
After i was being 'parked' at my ward and bed, another nurse placed the green pajamas patients are to wear on my bed end. I changed into it - after 2 hrs + after reconfirming with the nurse that I really need to wear that. ok, perhaps it still haven't sink in yet into me then... I know I can't escape, since probably no docs in their right minds will administer scans for anyone in civilian wear.
The ScanS... and Tests..
It was not 1 scan but 3 scans I went thru. Quite an experience... CT, MRI, EEG - now not only I know from the textbook I used to study but have also acquired practical knowledge... in some sense... Was quite worried abt the expenses that could arise from the scans initially. The 'lightening up' (jardon used by doc) was at the frontal lobe of my brain, right above my nose, though it was the back of my head that hit the ground. The doc went on to do another test the next day and it was really, really gruelling... My face almost wrinked as I typed this... Lumbar Puncture - extraction of brain fluid from my spine. Terrifying, right??! The first doc gave up on me after a few attempts; said I was too tense. I say she was too rough and hard on my spine! of course, i didn't verbalise it. She called for another doc and he was more assuring and affirmative. Did it. My first time experiencing how GA felt like.. And the next worse thing was that I gotta lie flat on my back for the next 6 hours. Gosh!! I have never watch TV for so long continually until that day. Can't sleep too as I tend to turn and toss. I received compassion from some nursing assistants, of which some say 4 hrs is good enough, some say have to die die fulfill 6 hrs...
Feels like ER
For those who watch the english drama ER, a scene where docs and nurses talked among themselves quickly and excitedly as they worked on the patient in the operating theatre was common. It happened exactly after my LP was done. I heard sayings like "This is the first in Singapore..."; "Let's send it down before 3..."; "...gotta spin it round", etc. I asked what was all that abt and even if "first in Singapore" means I am some sort of guinea pig?? NO, no, the doc reassured. It was just a new and the first in Singapore high-tech machine the hospital purchased and my sample would be the first to be tested; it's more accurate than the naked eye's observation, as done in the past. *whew* ok, that don't sounds so bad...
Thanksgiving
Though a hospital stay is less than desired, I certainly thank God for the visits and care shown by many during this period, however short it may be. On top of his usual role as my driver, my hubby became delivery man as well, bringing me stuff I requested for nightly. Most family members have shown assuring support as well. Even remote church members also came visiting (i call that remote as these friends are not from my church, neither the former church I attended).
And of course the FREE upgrade! I opted for the lower end ward as it is within govt subsidy. However, due to lack of beds there, I was given upgrade to a higher ward which includes TV and aircon!! That's a savings of $100~ per day! And the 'space' I occupied was the only spot that has a window in the room, which was actually quite breathtaking... Tk God for such loving care He shown me.
Interesting sms
From my 10 over year good friend -> "how long is your 'holiday' there?"
From a mutual jovial friend my hubby and I know -> "what happen 2 u? is it (my hubby's name) knock yr head against wall?"
From a young friend whom I have emailed before hospitalisation abt my intention to perm my hair -> "ok.. i will pray for u.. what happen? i only heard tat u wan to do something to ur hair.. how come end up, u injure ur head/brain..? it mus be a long story, rite..."
From a colleague who learnt of my LP ordeal and how it was carried out -> "Aiyo, sound scary. Pls take care n rest well."
From my hubby, in response to my remarks abt the less than desired sounds made by 'Darth Vader' neighbour patient when I was having meals -> "remove her mask and she will no longer make any noise." (btw, the term 'Darth Vader' was coined by my bro to describe that patient's breathing and sometimes phlegm sounds; none of my doings)
Of course, there were some other touching and heartwarming smses as well. My tks and heartfelt appreciation to all of you who have prayed for me, visited me, called me, and bought stuff for me, yes, even crackers and tihbits!
Will need to go for a review scan and consultation in the coming mths. Meanwhile, now that I am discharged and resting at home for a while, I just wanna believe that these persistent dizzyness, appetite lack, food bland taste, proneness to fatigue and headache will go away completely and sooner than the few mths it takes for the affected part of my brain to recover. Supposed to be a few mths. Hmm... and certainly hope my sense of smell can return. Moving on, I'll just have to gradually start my regular cardio workout in order to improve my blood pressure level. And ha.. certainly not take alcoholic drinks as freely as I used to in the past.
Friday, September 29, 2006
Aunties, pls stop!
You've heard of sayings like "Two's company; three's a crowd". How about "Three women make a market"?
I experienced the full force of the latter saying on Monday. Did not recover from the persistent headache and appetite loss for the third day so naturally I headed for the doc. Didn't think it's good to continue to pop panadol for the third day, especially so when these discomfort came about after a God-knows-how I fall and hit on my head and subsequent lie flat on the ground then discovered by my hubby... Was really embarrasing... but also quite drama.. ;) Wish I could see it in tape! Thank God the only one who saw this was my husband since it was quite late at night then. Till now, I have no remembrance of my doings right after I stopped at the agreed spot to wait for my hubby to pick me up. I only wondered why my head hurted when I awoke the next morning.
Have thought the doc would recommend a more conservative approach after hearing my story but hmm... he gave some muscles relaxers and pain killers only. And of course, the MC! :D
Anyway, back to the aunties story (sorry that I 'detoured' so much!), at the clinic, I was seated unfortunately right in the middle of these 3 aunties, who actually did not know one another earlier but somehow struck up some good (and long and loud) conversations among themselves. And there I was, having some forces pounding relentlessly within my head... wishing just for some peace... How I wish I could have a remote control to mute them! If not, at least the aunty 2 seats away from me could move to sit nearer the other 2 aunties! That way, their chatter could be more 'contained'.
Of course that didn't happen. They continued to chat like there will not be any tomorrows...
Sometimes, I wonder in the midst of the chatter, do they remember this poor girl caught in between them, desperately needing some rest and quiet? I was not willing to move elsewhere as that would mean I have to stand for the long wait of medicine since there were no other seats and I really needed to sit down.
Hmm... next time I just hope people (perhaps esp. aunties!) will be more considerate :I Am still nursing my head even as I blog!
I experienced the full force of the latter saying on Monday. Did not recover from the persistent headache and appetite loss for the third day so naturally I headed for the doc. Didn't think it's good to continue to pop panadol for the third day, especially so when these discomfort came about after a God-knows-how I fall and hit on my head and subsequent lie flat on the ground then discovered by my hubby... Was really embarrasing... but also quite drama.. ;) Wish I could see it in tape! Thank God the only one who saw this was my husband since it was quite late at night then. Till now, I have no remembrance of my doings right after I stopped at the agreed spot to wait for my hubby to pick me up. I only wondered why my head hurted when I awoke the next morning.
Have thought the doc would recommend a more conservative approach after hearing my story but hmm... he gave some muscles relaxers and pain killers only. And of course, the MC! :D
Anyway, back to the aunties story (sorry that I 'detoured' so much!), at the clinic, I was seated unfortunately right in the middle of these 3 aunties, who actually did not know one another earlier but somehow struck up some good (and long and loud) conversations among themselves. And there I was, having some forces pounding relentlessly within my head... wishing just for some peace... How I wish I could have a remote control to mute them! If not, at least the aunty 2 seats away from me could move to sit nearer the other 2 aunties! That way, their chatter could be more 'contained'.
Of course that didn't happen. They continued to chat like there will not be any tomorrows...
Sometimes, I wonder in the midst of the chatter, do they remember this poor girl caught in between them, desperately needing some rest and quiet? I was not willing to move elsewhere as that would mean I have to stand for the long wait of medicine since there were no other seats and I really needed to sit down.
Hmm... next time I just hope people (perhaps esp. aunties!) will be more considerate :I Am still nursing my head even as I blog!
Sunday, September 24, 2006
TGIF @ Work
This is the long overdue sequel to one of my first blogs titled "Colleague's left, what's next?".
For a short recap, I set up a mini lunchtime Christian fellowship group with 2 colleagues - after 1 year of enduring 'spiritual desert' at work... After that particular colleague quitted, another came along. However, I wondered if I have already served the purpose? Later, I learnt that there was already in existence a fellowship group that meets every Fri. They called their meetings 'TGIF', whereas mine was 'TWWJ' - This Wed With Jesus. I was keen to 'combine forces' but the newcomer was not keen for some reasons. I knew there was some issues but did not wish to pursue.
After some time, this person also left. Didn't quite feel it's ideal to go at that time but we respect others' choices and wish them God's best, amen? Thus, we finally 'invite ourselves' over...
The beginning was a bit bumpy for me due to some person's perception of the church I am attending. No mention of names here but it's the origin of the catchphrase "Greatly blessed, highly favoured, deeply loved". It's a simple but classy way of terming God's heart for His children.
When somewhat challenged by well-meaning pple on the church's doctrines, all I could (and wanna said) was that it's the (spiritual) fruits that will tell. After that, I shared with the other colleague (who came from the same group as me), that if this form of challenge were to continue or grow, I would voluntarily opt out of the group in order not to stumble others. It's not as if I am afraid of being shot each time I were to attend the meetings but more of that I don't wish to be part of the reason for the meeting's purpose of sharing and edifying to degenerate into theological debate that nourishes little or leave a bad aftertaste.
So, guess what was the ending? Recalling back during one of our meetings, I was pleasantly surprised when one of the members said she was looking forward to my sharing. It was my turn to share then and we were watching some videos earlier while eating our lunches. I was ready to pass my slot and go with the flow but that verbalised request just somehow stirred me... God's people are just so hungry to know more of His love, grace and all sufficient spiritual food.
Guess the iron rod can go now... :P God be magnified!
For a short recap, I set up a mini lunchtime Christian fellowship group with 2 colleagues - after 1 year of enduring 'spiritual desert' at work... After that particular colleague quitted, another came along. However, I wondered if I have already served the purpose? Later, I learnt that there was already in existence a fellowship group that meets every Fri. They called their meetings 'TGIF', whereas mine was 'TWWJ' - This Wed With Jesus. I was keen to 'combine forces' but the newcomer was not keen for some reasons. I knew there was some issues but did not wish to pursue.
After some time, this person also left. Didn't quite feel it's ideal to go at that time but we respect others' choices and wish them God's best, amen? Thus, we finally 'invite ourselves' over...
The beginning was a bit bumpy for me due to some person's perception of the church I am attending. No mention of names here but it's the origin of the catchphrase "Greatly blessed, highly favoured, deeply loved". It's a simple but classy way of terming God's heart for His children.
When somewhat challenged by well-meaning pple on the church's doctrines, all I could (and wanna said) was that it's the (spiritual) fruits that will tell. After that, I shared with the other colleague (who came from the same group as me), that if this form of challenge were to continue or grow, I would voluntarily opt out of the group in order not to stumble others. It's not as if I am afraid of being shot each time I were to attend the meetings but more of that I don't wish to be part of the reason for the meeting's purpose of sharing and edifying to degenerate into theological debate that nourishes little or leave a bad aftertaste.
So, guess what was the ending? Recalling back during one of our meetings, I was pleasantly surprised when one of the members said she was looking forward to my sharing. It was my turn to share then and we were watching some videos earlier while eating our lunches. I was ready to pass my slot and go with the flow but that verbalised request just somehow stirred me... God's people are just so hungry to know more of His love, grace and all sufficient spiritual food.
Guess the iron rod can go now... :P God be magnified!
R u a Spiritual Farmer? Harvesting yet?
I'm the type who loves quotations (not poems though). Found it meaningful and easy to remember simple truths this way. I used to archive meaningful liners here and there. One day, perhaps, I will include them here for sharing, but more so, to remind myself! Here's one for the believers!-> "Christians are spiritual farmers - words (God's word and promises) are the seeds and faith (believer's) is the water." - from Believers' Voice of Victory
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Lesson from a kettle...
I once heard of someone learning some precious lessons through his hobby of planting and pruning. Well, this is not exactly new to me cos' I'm someone who takes to analogy learning pretty well too.
Close friends who know me and my other half will know that we have been 'battling' a certain situation for sometime (it's not having babies - just in case that pops up your mind ;). And it's only human nature to wonder when it will come. There are definitely times when we were unbelieveably positive about the future while there are times when both of us were down in the pit of pits; sometimes, one of us might even masked on a brave and nothing-bothers-me front (though somewhat bleeding inside), so as not to affect the other one, lest the other is pulled down as well. People who are in love, you understand what I am getting at?
Having said all that, this is to the concerned friends out there: we do talk abt such issues when we have to; it's not always the quiet building up of volcano waiting to erupt spectacularly (or tragically) someday :]
As for the kettle... I was in one of these moods when I was filling up water in our kettle for boiling one night. As the tap ran, my eyes stared in front blankly. After a while (as if suddenly burst out of my daydreaming), I wondered why there was none of that typical sound of splashing water... know what I mean? I looked down and realised, to my surprise that indeed, the water was filling up the pot.
Only quietly. Unnoticed.
Instantly, I felt as if the Lord softly telling me, that though I may not see it, it is coming. To the like-minded people out there, you may have came across this verse - Faith is the substance of things hoped for and evidence of things unseen - Hebrews 11:1. Another verson states it this way - Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Well, that's what I like to share today =) May you find encouragement in the darkness of your days too! Shalom!
Close friends who know me and my other half will know that we have been 'battling' a certain situation for sometime (it's not having babies - just in case that pops up your mind ;). And it's only human nature to wonder when it will come. There are definitely times when we were unbelieveably positive about the future while there are times when both of us were down in the pit of pits; sometimes, one of us might even masked on a brave and nothing-bothers-me front (though somewhat bleeding inside), so as not to affect the other one, lest the other is pulled down as well. People who are in love, you understand what I am getting at?
Having said all that, this is to the concerned friends out there: we do talk abt such issues when we have to; it's not always the quiet building up of volcano waiting to erupt spectacularly (or tragically) someday :]
As for the kettle... I was in one of these moods when I was filling up water in our kettle for boiling one night. As the tap ran, my eyes stared in front blankly. After a while (as if suddenly burst out of my daydreaming), I wondered why there was none of that typical sound of splashing water... know what I mean? I looked down and realised, to my surprise that indeed, the water was filling up the pot.
Only quietly. Unnoticed.
Instantly, I felt as if the Lord softly telling me, that though I may not see it, it is coming. To the like-minded people out there, you may have came across this verse - Faith is the substance of things hoped for and evidence of things unseen - Hebrews 11:1. Another verson states it this way - Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Well, that's what I like to share today =) May you find encouragement in the darkness of your days too! Shalom!
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Chasing Fireworks!
Last week, I didn't manage to have a proper view of the fireworks. How often do you get to catch it anyway? First, for the eve of National Day, I was occupied with some kind of farewell fellowship (if you can term that!) with some friends. Sad that they are leaving Singapore for some years (yes, depart on National Day) but well, people come and go.
So, when I hear from colleagues the next day that the fireworks the night before were really spectacular, I felt what a great thing I missed out! Hence, I decided with my hubby that we better make sure we catch the fireworks on National Day! But... I got the timing wrong; thought it could start later, like the night before! Thank God for husbands who remember... (though they don't always remember things). We ended up rushing to a HDB block near ICA to view it. My hubby again complained that I perpectually imagined his white corona to be a rocket :P We were desperately looking for carpark lots in the multistorey carpark but couldn't find any! I wound down the window so as to take heed of the start of the fireworks. In less than 2 min time, I heard it! My hubby stopped his car at an unauthorised spot, on his hazard lights and out we rushed out! Yea, his car was blocking other cars but hey, at that moment, everyone else will be watching the fireworks, um.. ya? Thank God that the carpark was connected to the flat and we managed to catch sight of it, even though it was a smaller sight. It was shorter than I expected :( Nevertheless, we still give thanks. At least we caught it this time, considered that it was an almost miss! :>
Have not given it much thoughts but learn that this weekend, there would be fireworks too! So, last night (Fri), my hubby and I 'smuggled out' from a meeting (to put it plainly: we actually pre-leave before official time, lar!) and .... we caught it!! This time, we were closer. Right before we cross the traffic light towards the Esplande, right on time at 9pm, the fireworks came on! I remember running in my heels towards the scene for a better look. Sometimes, I feel my hubby is playing the daddy role in making sure I don't hurt myself or run across the road (of course I didn't!) hee hee...
I was really happy. Recorded 2 scenes on my sony erricson mobile. Didn't expect that tonight (meaning Sat) will have another round! This time, we were out with a couple friend and their 2-yr-old boy. We went to another place for viewing and it was nicer than the night before =]
I mused to my hubby, that it seems after Lee Hsien Loong took over, we have been able to enjoy fireworks more often! Not bad! ;) Well, as some said, after all, what went up there was also ultimately our money. Ha! Nevertheless, it was definitely cheers and boast to the spirit of Singaporeans!
So, when I hear from colleagues the next day that the fireworks the night before were really spectacular, I felt what a great thing I missed out! Hence, I decided with my hubby that we better make sure we catch the fireworks on National Day! But... I got the timing wrong; thought it could start later, like the night before! Thank God for husbands who remember... (though they don't always remember things). We ended up rushing to a HDB block near ICA to view it. My hubby again complained that I perpectually imagined his white corona to be a rocket :P We were desperately looking for carpark lots in the multistorey carpark but couldn't find any! I wound down the window so as to take heed of the start of the fireworks. In less than 2 min time, I heard it! My hubby stopped his car at an unauthorised spot, on his hazard lights and out we rushed out! Yea, his car was blocking other cars but hey, at that moment, everyone else will be watching the fireworks, um.. ya? Thank God that the carpark was connected to the flat and we managed to catch sight of it, even though it was a smaller sight. It was shorter than I expected :( Nevertheless, we still give thanks. At least we caught it this time, considered that it was an almost miss! :>
Have not given it much thoughts but learn that this weekend, there would be fireworks too! So, last night (Fri), my hubby and I 'smuggled out' from a meeting (to put it plainly: we actually pre-leave before official time, lar!) and .... we caught it!! This time, we were closer. Right before we cross the traffic light towards the Esplande, right on time at 9pm, the fireworks came on! I remember running in my heels towards the scene for a better look. Sometimes, I feel my hubby is playing the daddy role in making sure I don't hurt myself or run across the road (of course I didn't!) hee hee...
I was really happy. Recorded 2 scenes on my sony erricson mobile. Didn't expect that tonight (meaning Sat) will have another round! This time, we were out with a couple friend and their 2-yr-old boy. We went to another place for viewing and it was nicer than the night before =]
I mused to my hubby, that it seems after Lee Hsien Loong took over, we have been able to enjoy fireworks more often! Not bad! ;) Well, as some said, after all, what went up there was also ultimately our money. Ha! Nevertheless, it was definitely cheers and boast to the spirit of Singaporeans!
NLB Great Sale Squeeze
Last year, I missed the National Library Board sale. Prices was slashed to unbelievably low though the books naturally are not in crisp new condition... This year, I was more diligent ;) Tk God for a hubby who would drive me there in the morning - to join the 'snake' queue. I arrive 5 min after official opening time but the queue was already more than 400 metres long, if not, longer!
The Singapore Squeeze
Now, I know that apart from the strange phenomenon that Singaporeans love to queue up for things, I am fully aware that Singaporeans can be ugly in certain settings (for e.g. when they are all fighting for that seemingly 1 thing which in the end they may not desperately need after all), I wasn't ready that I hardly have more than 1 min to browse the books on each section so as to decide whether to buy it or not! It felt almost like factory assembly line! Move, stop, pause, move on...
One Lesson To Bring Back...
You guessed it - the attire! Though it may sounds familiar to warfare preparation, you will not lose out if you wear prepared for any pushing or stepping on - be it someone else's feet or worse, wheels carrying full load of books dragged mindlessly by frantic browsers! I was frustrated and stated in the most diplomatic and firm tone for that fellow to watch out for his wheels. But, all fell on deaf ears. *sigh* Well, the conclusion is: wear shoes and keep your open toes shoes at home! If possible, wear thicker clothing so that you won't be suceptible to blue-blacks when you get out of the place!
More Kiasu-ism To Come!
What I was not prepared for was a sighting in the queue. Well, it was a long, long queue as expected. Thus, to make the wait less torturing, I picked up one of the books I planned to buy and read as I queued and moved up the queue, while at times, using my feet to shift my plastic bag of books ahead as I moved forward. Gradually, I saw more and more of this 'technique ' being practised. But, my jaws almost dropped when I saw a lady singlehandedly dragged 2 bags of books from behind her, and with each move forward, pushed not 1 but 3 bags of books ahead of her!!! Did her helpers abandon her or was it kiasu-ism in manifestation?!
To sum it up, it was indeed an experience to remember for some time to come. I have been to warehouse sale before but never been in such a packed place. It was almost like a 'warhouse' sale... I actually almost lost my balance twice due to the hurried pushing of others in their relentless pursuit of their books. Well, thank God that His angels got hold of me! ;> I will surely be more prepared for next round (yes, i'll be back!) The 45 min wait and some uninvited kia-su pushing were somehow worth it, cos' I took back 5 good books that cost me only $10!
The Singapore Squeeze
Now, I know that apart from the strange phenomenon that Singaporeans love to queue up for things, I am fully aware that Singaporeans can be ugly in certain settings (for e.g. when they are all fighting for that seemingly 1 thing which in the end they may not desperately need after all), I wasn't ready that I hardly have more than 1 min to browse the books on each section so as to decide whether to buy it or not! It felt almost like factory assembly line! Move, stop, pause, move on...
One Lesson To Bring Back...
You guessed it - the attire! Though it may sounds familiar to warfare preparation, you will not lose out if you wear prepared for any pushing or stepping on - be it someone else's feet or worse, wheels carrying full load of books dragged mindlessly by frantic browsers! I was frustrated and stated in the most diplomatic and firm tone for that fellow to watch out for his wheels. But, all fell on deaf ears. *sigh* Well, the conclusion is: wear shoes and keep your open toes shoes at home! If possible, wear thicker clothing so that you won't be suceptible to blue-blacks when you get out of the place!
More Kiasu-ism To Come!
What I was not prepared for was a sighting in the queue. Well, it was a long, long queue as expected. Thus, to make the wait less torturing, I picked up one of the books I planned to buy and read as I queued and moved up the queue, while at times, using my feet to shift my plastic bag of books ahead as I moved forward. Gradually, I saw more and more of this 'technique ' being practised. But, my jaws almost dropped when I saw a lady singlehandedly dragged 2 bags of books from behind her, and with each move forward, pushed not 1 but 3 bags of books ahead of her!!! Did her helpers abandon her or was it kiasu-ism in manifestation?!
To sum it up, it was indeed an experience to remember for some time to come. I have been to warehouse sale before but never been in such a packed place. It was almost like a 'warhouse' sale... I actually almost lost my balance twice due to the hurried pushing of others in their relentless pursuit of their books. Well, thank God that His angels got hold of me! ;> I will surely be more prepared for next round (yes, i'll be back!) The 45 min wait and some uninvited kia-su pushing were somehow worth it, cos' I took back 5 good books that cost me only $10!
Sunday, August 06, 2006
Now, what?
Results are out. In fact, have been out for 2 wks. Guess I don't sound as excited cos' the hype has died down as time goes by... I thank God that I have passed. B grade is not too bad... considering that this subject is one of the killer ones... Well I guess i ain't sounding too excited cos' I came to realise that things will be pretty much the same for the next quarter, if not longer than that. Earlier on, I was quite excited at the changes that could be coming up (ever heard of people looking forward to changes?). Now, I have kinda resigned to the fact (or rather, decision) to hold my horses and wait and see.
Some of you might know how that feel... *sigh* the process of having to bite the bullet and hang on... the agony of wanting and yet having to hold back... the longing for breakthrough that seems so near and yet so far away... and you wonder whether ultimately you will get there or is it just a dream?
Just have to psych myself: Relax. Be patient. Enjoy the process. No point sulking since you're gonna go thru' the process anyway. Might as well enjoy it. Yea? :I
Some of you might know how that feel... *sigh* the process of having to bite the bullet and hang on... the agony of wanting and yet having to hold back... the longing for breakthrough that seems so near and yet so far away... and you wonder whether ultimately you will get there or is it just a dream?
Just have to psych myself: Relax. Be patient. Enjoy the process. No point sulking since you're gonna go thru' the process anyway. Might as well enjoy it. Yea? :I
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
The road to liberty has not been easy... and Liberty is so wonderful!
19 June 2006
This is a rather special date, for it marked the day of my last exam for the semester - for my degree programme. Indeed, the journey was not as easy (and short) as I have thought but am glad it's all over. Not to say that I did not enjoy the stuff I have learnt though. It was good, though the assignments and deadlines were at times quite stressful.
Why was it not easy?
Now, I am FREE from the thought of restarting my 'study gear' when the next semester starts. It doesn't concern me anymore! And no more mandated reading of texts. I can pick up other reference bks I have longed bought for reading at my leisure... Yea, am quite sure I will clear this paper; have actually estimated my grade - best and worst scenarios - both in safe ground ;) Of course, with God's goodness included in (actually, overtaking everything else), how can I not do well??
Prelude
Anyway, the day didn't started well for my 9am paper. In fact, the trouble began the night before... I have planned earlier to be in bed by 1am. However, at 12+, I began to hear some vrooming and it kept repeating... Now, my place is really at one end of the island; you can literally see the sea. You can say that it's quite u-lu here, cos you hardly see cars at night along that long stretch of road out there. So, I thought some punkies are playing with their bikes there, but no... they were further, yet so resounding (in a bad way). Guess where they were? Irritably smart of them - they actually were across the Sungei river, vrooming back and forth in barely 200 metres of lane, at a kumpong-like land. Don't know how they got there but it sure is a place not as assessible for traffic police to visit.
I dismissed the noises and resumed my study, only to find myself more disturbed by those inconsiderate persistent noises... Why? At an hour when pple are sleeping? Did they think that b'cos they were across a river, their engines become mute? In fact, it was so loud that I suspect modifications have been made to increase the engine decibel. Even the police officer on the phone could hear that.
Yup. I rang up the man in blue. First, it was a lady who picked up. She was diligent and agreed that she heard some noise in the background. Would alert the traffic police, she said. In case you think I was too worked up or the study stress has gotten to me, it was half an hour later before I rang up triple nine (the police lady did not answer on what the more appropriate no. to call was, even though I asked in the beginning).
And, you suppose things are ok after that? I realised I could not get into sleep anyway with those noises, so I decided to study a bit more, so that those bikers would have called it a night by then. 2 am arrived. Vrooming continues. And naturally, the next phone call also took place. A male officer picked up the call. This time, he was the one who exclaimed at the loudness of the noises he heard. He totally agreed with my diplomatic speech of feedback (no, I didn't lash out at anyone, even though I was tired and upset) and he sounded eager when he said he would check with the traffic police for updates.
No reports or updates came back to me. Perhaps that officer took note that I have mentioned I need to sleep now for the sake of my exam next morning! I remembered the vrooming continued even when my body touched the bedsheets. Probably I was too tired (slept at 4+am the night before) that it didn't take too long before slumberland enfolded me...
Cosy Morning + Surprise from Car = ?
My hubby woke me up. It seemed that I have missed the sound of my alarm... (it happens whenever I gets too tired). He actually willingly volunteered to sleep outside for the night so that I could have better sleep for my exam the next day! :p Tk God for such a considerable husband! Well, of course, that came by after my complaint of his unbearable snoring when I tried to get into sleep at 4+ am the night before. I ended up sleeping on the coach that night. So, I guess, hmm.... fair, right? ;p
Anyway, I mumbled to him that the weather was good, and I will rise after 5 more min when my alarm ring again. It won't be so bad cos' he would be sending me to the exam venue :) Punggol to Bukit Merah. Travel duration by public transport vs car is a whole lot of precious differences!!
In case you wonder if I messed up by exceeding my 5 promised min - no. Everything was good. Until the car hit the road... We realised the car tyre was not doing well. And the cosy weather that preceded the heavy downpour has came down. What a combi! At 8.10am, we were at a sheltered area where my hubby changed the tyre. Honestly, I was very tempted to act on what I have told him earlier (twice), that I would take a cab to my exam venue. Sometimes, he gets more anxious than me, esp when it comes to punctuality. I gotta catch up with him on that! The fact that 2 empty cabs actually whisked by didn't help, esp when 1 even stopped for a longer time than expected. Should I or should I not? I thought that my hubby would be real disppointed if I should 'jump ship' (jump car, in this case), since he actually changed the tyre himself, dirtied his hands, when he could have send it to a proper place to change it, which has to be done ultimately. If I should hurriedly rush off, he probably would be left thinking "So, would somebody tell me what I am doing this for?"
So, I commit this to the Lord. God, Your word has said that I am a priest (the royal priesthood verse, for those who know what I am talking abt). And the words of a priest has power, as does a believer in Christ, as mentioned in other verses of the Book. Thus, I asked (actually more of declare or command) the rain to simmer so that it will be easier for my hubby to drive later, and that I will not be so late till I don't have enough time to finish my paper.
And, indeed, the rain simmer. We set off at abt 8.20am, from SengKang. Though the rain has simmered, it was still quite heavy but I tk God that it was at least visible and not as hazardous. Traffic holdup at one of the expressways did not help. Worse, my stomach didn't feel well (the kind that you wish to go to the loo to do some 'closure') but I was stuck in the middle of the jam in the expressway, and to risk arriving later was rather unthinkable. So, pray lar... This is one of those times that all you can do (the only thing you can do, in fact) is to call upon the higher Source of help. You might think I was stressed but I mused abt last night's episode of Lord of the Ring (Twin Tower) where Gollum strugged with the evil forces, by confidently and repeatedly speaking "Leave and never come back!". Indeed, there are so much Christian anologies in the movie. Don't the verse in 1 Peter 5:9 also says "Resist him (devil), standing firm in the faith (in Christ's finished work and victory)..." and in James 4:7 "Resist the devil, and he will flee from you." Now, doesn't that sound like Gollum's words... "Leave and never come back". The word is "flee", which I shared with my hubby. The devil is not walking away in a manner that is like throwing up one hands and just give up; it spoke of fright and fear, otherwise, why the word "flee"? Somehow, the words "Christ's finished work" kept coming to my mind as I prayed. I would say that I was calmer b'cos I rested on His finished works. I just realised that the first part of James 4:7 says "Submit yourselves, then to God." By resting on His finished works, I was submitting, I realised. No need to depend on myself, which can't do much anyway. My hubby realised that we have not prayed for journey mercy the night before, though he has prayed for me for my exam. I shared that even though God knows all things, we need to speak forth and articule our requests. Perhaps by not speaking, the devil came into that 'untouched' part to wrack havoc. I also realised my spoken words of "will have no time to check thru' my ans" came true. That was when my hubby asked if I would be able to complete my paper, since I was running late.
Anyway, as I began to give tks and focused more on my revision notes whilst in the car, we arrived! Though I knew everyone else has entered the exam rooms, I knew the better thing to do is to settle the more urgent thing first... After coming out from the toilet, I entered the nearest exam room. And I don't even need to walk more than 5 steps! Seemed like all other seats were occupied except that one. Hmm... God reserved for me?
The Exam
Right after I settle down at my seat, the exam personnel announced that all examinees could start writing. Wow! It was 9.20am when I went in. That meant they started at 9.10am actually! I just missed the earlier 10 min reading time! Thank God!!
I tk God too that the paper was quite manageable. Actually mistook that there were 100 qns (MCQ). Even thought I was progressing well at half time. Towards the 3rd quarter of the paper, I started to slow down my pace. Even tried to re-find that particular strand of my split-end hair which I have earlier spotted but dismissed it to concentrate on my paper. Tkfully, that did not take up more than 5 sec, though it was still precious. Yea, I have this habit of trimming off my split-ends whenever I spotted them. That explains why I always have a small pair of scissors with me. I am not mad, just consciencous...
Was not too ready for the shock when I read qn 100 and realised there were still some more qns behind! Oh gosh! 50 more! It's 150 qns for this 2-hr paper! Again, the frentic pace resumed, with some self-chiding for my complacency :s
All tks to God's grace, I managed to finish all the qns. Could not check thru' my ans or re-think some tough qns but I did my best... Much later, my coursemate called my hp. She wondered where I was before the exam and was shocked when I told her I was late for 20 min. And you know what? She could not finish the paper, even though she arrived on time! Wow... what went on for me was really God's grace at work! not my works!
FREEDOM!! Now, to reward myself...
It really feel so shiok to know that I would not be touching books and no more deadlines to meet - for some time to come. This did not fully sink in, even after I have left the exam building, but it sure did during the afternoon, when I kinda paint the town red... Nope, didn't spend till my pocket broke. In fact, I realised God even looks after the small things for me... even in shopping, can you believe it? Indeed, it's a good thing to bring God along for shopping :P
Bugis * Orchard * Plaza Singapura
Erm... you might have wow to that. Honestly, I also feel a bit pai-seh to list those places out. Have not quite done my shopping this far apart. But, of course, I have my reasons for that.
First, Bugis was the spot I planned to go to get an orange rugged belt for my darling (aka hubby). He was quite fasincated by it, until he saw the price tag... I wanted to buy for him cos' i have been enjoying shopping while he did not buy any 'I-want' stuff as he was not as liberated as me to shop at leisure. I myself was also taken aback at the price of the belt, which is more expensive than a typical lady's blouse I might purchase. And indeed, the clothing I bought today (1 pants and 2 tops) - the price by the individual item, could not match up to the belt price. Now, it's true after all... Men's stuff are expensive!
And the part abt God at work for my shopping... It was seen as a blessing in disguise! Today, I learnt to rest in God's soverignty - even in purchasing stuff! At a boutique, I tried on 3 tops. Needed to get some working clothes as some of my existing ones are wearing out, or rather, have worn out. Earlier, I hesistated in buying from this boutique, cos' their clothing are not cheap. Without discount, 2 pcs can easily cost nearly S$70! And it's not top-notch super brand, as far as I am concerned. I am certainly not happy to part with that amount of $ that easily at this point in time. This time, 20% discount is offered if you get 2 pcs. After trying, I made my selection. The new piece that was brought up by the sales girl has a stain which I was not confident of cleaning off. And it was the last piece (always the case?). For the other top - the only piece left was the one I tried on. Now, these clothing are knitted material. I noticed that there were signs of wearing off, even though it was quite slight. Well, I guess, it does not rest well for me to pay for something that is of compromised standard, just as it is for some of you out there. To make things worse, after I have at last decided to just close one eye and buy, the boutique staff told me (quite abruptly) that their Nets machine is not in service until some serviceperson arrive hrs later. After telling me that, she resumed to reconciling the cashier slips she has laid on the counter, where the 2 pcs I was supposed to buy, also laid.
GEMS? Go The Extra Mile Singapore? Was there really such a campaign that have gone on? Gone with the wind, perhaps... Such lousy service really put me off. Don't they know that I was a sincere buyer? Given the amt of time I have spent in the boutique and the compromise I was ready to make? They did not even offer any alternatives after telling me that they cannot accept Nets payment at that point in time. What would you have done if you were me?
Off I left. Without a word. Anyway, the sales girl was not expecting me to say anything (she was busy with her slips). Perhaps tkfully so I left without saying anything. If I have done so, that might have been an episode of me losing self-control, a fruit of the Spirit! Ok, God has better things in store for me. Or at least, I deserve better service, even as a shopper! Later, I realised that God knew I was not completely happy with the purchase (and the service), so He actually 'close the door' for me. Isn't He wonderful? I was pleasantly surprised to realise later that with the same amt I would have paid for that 2 pcs, I actually brought 3 pcs later, and I like them all! In fact, out of the 3 pcs, 2 were the type of clothing that I have been wanting to get. All 3 were on discount. God is good, amen?
And the Angel re-open the door, upon hearing the Password?
After buying the 3 pcs from Orchard, I went on the Plaza Sing, my last stop for the day, to get the discounted bedsheets. By then, my arms and hands were quite tired, having carried my bks and the shopping stuff for hours. Took the train to Dohby Ghaut. Would have been able to enter the train in time, had not the man in front block the walkway on the escalator with his bulky bag. Still, though I missed the door (yea, I tried to rushed in), I still give tks. Tk God, now, at least I won't have to compete for the chance to sit on those limited sitting area, whilst waiting for the next train! And I really have no idea that God is so near, that right after I gave tks (in my mind), the train doors, actually closed, reopened! Wow! I ran in! I am so dearly loved, that God is willing to hold the train (and all its passengers) just to let me catch this train... :p
I didn't manage to get the bedsheets in the end. A bit disappointed but it was fine. Have not expected that the shipman could be delayed, after all the advertising in their newsletters. Nevertheless, I remained happy, cos God has blessed me much! Now moving on after my studies, I have new goals to pursue!
This is a rather special date, for it marked the day of my last exam for the semester - for my degree programme. Indeed, the journey was not as easy (and short) as I have thought but am glad it's all over. Not to say that I did not enjoy the stuff I have learnt though. It was good, though the assignments and deadlines were at times quite stressful.
Why was it not easy?
Now, I am FREE from the thought of restarting my 'study gear' when the next semester starts. It doesn't concern me anymore! And no more mandated reading of texts. I can pick up other reference bks I have longed bought for reading at my leisure... Yea, am quite sure I will clear this paper; have actually estimated my grade - best and worst scenarios - both in safe ground ;) Of course, with God's goodness included in (actually, overtaking everything else), how can I not do well??
Prelude
Anyway, the day didn't started well for my 9am paper. In fact, the trouble began the night before... I have planned earlier to be in bed by 1am. However, at 12+, I began to hear some vrooming and it kept repeating... Now, my place is really at one end of the island; you can literally see the sea. You can say that it's quite u-lu here, cos you hardly see cars at night along that long stretch of road out there. So, I thought some punkies are playing with their bikes there, but no... they were further, yet so resounding (in a bad way). Guess where they were? Irritably smart of them - they actually were across the Sungei river, vrooming back and forth in barely 200 metres of lane, at a kumpong-like land. Don't know how they got there but it sure is a place not as assessible for traffic police to visit.
I dismissed the noises and resumed my study, only to find myself more disturbed by those inconsiderate persistent noises... Why? At an hour when pple are sleeping? Did they think that b'cos they were across a river, their engines become mute? In fact, it was so loud that I suspect modifications have been made to increase the engine decibel. Even the police officer on the phone could hear that.
Yup. I rang up the man in blue. First, it was a lady who picked up. She was diligent and agreed that she heard some noise in the background. Would alert the traffic police, she said. In case you think I was too worked up or the study stress has gotten to me, it was half an hour later before I rang up triple nine (the police lady did not answer on what the more appropriate no. to call was, even though I asked in the beginning).
And, you suppose things are ok after that? I realised I could not get into sleep anyway with those noises, so I decided to study a bit more, so that those bikers would have called it a night by then. 2 am arrived. Vrooming continues. And naturally, the next phone call also took place. A male officer picked up the call. This time, he was the one who exclaimed at the loudness of the noises he heard. He totally agreed with my diplomatic speech of feedback (no, I didn't lash out at anyone, even though I was tired and upset) and he sounded eager when he said he would check with the traffic police for updates.
No reports or updates came back to me. Perhaps that officer took note that I have mentioned I need to sleep now for the sake of my exam next morning! I remembered the vrooming continued even when my body touched the bedsheets. Probably I was too tired (slept at 4+am the night before) that it didn't take too long before slumberland enfolded me...
Cosy Morning + Surprise from Car = ?
My hubby woke me up. It seemed that I have missed the sound of my alarm... (it happens whenever I gets too tired). He actually willingly volunteered to sleep outside for the night so that I could have better sleep for my exam the next day! :p Tk God for such a considerable husband! Well, of course, that came by after my complaint of his unbearable snoring when I tried to get into sleep at 4+ am the night before. I ended up sleeping on the coach that night. So, I guess, hmm.... fair, right? ;p
Anyway, I mumbled to him that the weather was good, and I will rise after 5 more min when my alarm ring again. It won't be so bad cos' he would be sending me to the exam venue :) Punggol to Bukit Merah. Travel duration by public transport vs car is a whole lot of precious differences!!
In case you wonder if I messed up by exceeding my 5 promised min - no. Everything was good. Until the car hit the road... We realised the car tyre was not doing well. And the cosy weather that preceded the heavy downpour has came down. What a combi! At 8.10am, we were at a sheltered area where my hubby changed the tyre. Honestly, I was very tempted to act on what I have told him earlier (twice), that I would take a cab to my exam venue. Sometimes, he gets more anxious than me, esp when it comes to punctuality. I gotta catch up with him on that! The fact that 2 empty cabs actually whisked by didn't help, esp when 1 even stopped for a longer time than expected. Should I or should I not? I thought that my hubby would be real disppointed if I should 'jump ship' (jump car, in this case), since he actually changed the tyre himself, dirtied his hands, when he could have send it to a proper place to change it, which has to be done ultimately. If I should hurriedly rush off, he probably would be left thinking "So, would somebody tell me what I am doing this for?"
So, I commit this to the Lord. God, Your word has said that I am a priest (the royal priesthood verse, for those who know what I am talking abt). And the words of a priest has power, as does a believer in Christ, as mentioned in other verses of the Book. Thus, I asked (actually more of declare or command) the rain to simmer so that it will be easier for my hubby to drive later, and that I will not be so late till I don't have enough time to finish my paper.
And, indeed, the rain simmer. We set off at abt 8.20am, from SengKang. Though the rain has simmered, it was still quite heavy but I tk God that it was at least visible and not as hazardous. Traffic holdup at one of the expressways did not help. Worse, my stomach didn't feel well (the kind that you wish to go to the loo to do some 'closure') but I was stuck in the middle of the jam in the expressway, and to risk arriving later was rather unthinkable. So, pray lar... This is one of those times that all you can do (the only thing you can do, in fact) is to call upon the higher Source of help. You might think I was stressed but I mused abt last night's episode of Lord of the Ring (Twin Tower) where Gollum strugged with the evil forces, by confidently and repeatedly speaking "Leave and never come back!". Indeed, there are so much Christian anologies in the movie. Don't the verse in 1 Peter 5:9 also says "Resist him (devil), standing firm in the faith (in Christ's finished work and victory)..." and in James 4:7 "Resist the devil, and he will flee from you." Now, doesn't that sound like Gollum's words... "Leave and never come back". The word is "flee", which I shared with my hubby. The devil is not walking away in a manner that is like throwing up one hands and just give up; it spoke of fright and fear, otherwise, why the word "flee"? Somehow, the words "Christ's finished work" kept coming to my mind as I prayed. I would say that I was calmer b'cos I rested on His finished works. I just realised that the first part of James 4:7 says "Submit yourselves, then to God." By resting on His finished works, I was submitting, I realised. No need to depend on myself, which can't do much anyway. My hubby realised that we have not prayed for journey mercy the night before, though he has prayed for me for my exam. I shared that even though God knows all things, we need to speak forth and articule our requests. Perhaps by not speaking, the devil came into that 'untouched' part to wrack havoc. I also realised my spoken words of "will have no time to check thru' my ans" came true. That was when my hubby asked if I would be able to complete my paper, since I was running late.
Anyway, as I began to give tks and focused more on my revision notes whilst in the car, we arrived! Though I knew everyone else has entered the exam rooms, I knew the better thing to do is to settle the more urgent thing first... After coming out from the toilet, I entered the nearest exam room. And I don't even need to walk more than 5 steps! Seemed like all other seats were occupied except that one. Hmm... God reserved for me?
The Exam
Right after I settle down at my seat, the exam personnel announced that all examinees could start writing. Wow! It was 9.20am when I went in. That meant they started at 9.10am actually! I just missed the earlier 10 min reading time! Thank God!!
I tk God too that the paper was quite manageable. Actually mistook that there were 100 qns (MCQ). Even thought I was progressing well at half time. Towards the 3rd quarter of the paper, I started to slow down my pace. Even tried to re-find that particular strand of my split-end hair which I have earlier spotted but dismissed it to concentrate on my paper. Tkfully, that did not take up more than 5 sec, though it was still precious. Yea, I have this habit of trimming off my split-ends whenever I spotted them. That explains why I always have a small pair of scissors with me. I am not mad, just consciencous...
Was not too ready for the shock when I read qn 100 and realised there were still some more qns behind! Oh gosh! 50 more! It's 150 qns for this 2-hr paper! Again, the frentic pace resumed, with some self-chiding for my complacency :s
All tks to God's grace, I managed to finish all the qns. Could not check thru' my ans or re-think some tough qns but I did my best... Much later, my coursemate called my hp. She wondered where I was before the exam and was shocked when I told her I was late for 20 min. And you know what? She could not finish the paper, even though she arrived on time! Wow... what went on for me was really God's grace at work! not my works!
FREEDOM!! Now, to reward myself...
It really feel so shiok to know that I would not be touching books and no more deadlines to meet - for some time to come. This did not fully sink in, even after I have left the exam building, but it sure did during the afternoon, when I kinda paint the town red... Nope, didn't spend till my pocket broke. In fact, I realised God even looks after the small things for me... even in shopping, can you believe it? Indeed, it's a good thing to bring God along for shopping :P
Bugis * Orchard * Plaza Singapura
Erm... you might have wow to that. Honestly, I also feel a bit pai-seh to list those places out. Have not quite done my shopping this far apart. But, of course, I have my reasons for that.
First, Bugis was the spot I planned to go to get an orange rugged belt for my darling (aka hubby). He was quite fasincated by it, until he saw the price tag... I wanted to buy for him cos' i have been enjoying shopping while he did not buy any 'I-want' stuff as he was not as liberated as me to shop at leisure. I myself was also taken aback at the price of the belt, which is more expensive than a typical lady's blouse I might purchase. And indeed, the clothing I bought today (1 pants and 2 tops) - the price by the individual item, could not match up to the belt price. Now, it's true after all... Men's stuff are expensive!
And the part abt God at work for my shopping... It was seen as a blessing in disguise! Today, I learnt to rest in God's soverignty - even in purchasing stuff! At a boutique, I tried on 3 tops. Needed to get some working clothes as some of my existing ones are wearing out, or rather, have worn out. Earlier, I hesistated in buying from this boutique, cos' their clothing are not cheap. Without discount, 2 pcs can easily cost nearly S$70! And it's not top-notch super brand, as far as I am concerned. I am certainly not happy to part with that amount of $ that easily at this point in time. This time, 20% discount is offered if you get 2 pcs. After trying, I made my selection. The new piece that was brought up by the sales girl has a stain which I was not confident of cleaning off. And it was the last piece (always the case?). For the other top - the only piece left was the one I tried on. Now, these clothing are knitted material. I noticed that there were signs of wearing off, even though it was quite slight. Well, I guess, it does not rest well for me to pay for something that is of compromised standard, just as it is for some of you out there. To make things worse, after I have at last decided to just close one eye and buy, the boutique staff told me (quite abruptly) that their Nets machine is not in service until some serviceperson arrive hrs later. After telling me that, she resumed to reconciling the cashier slips she has laid on the counter, where the 2 pcs I was supposed to buy, also laid.
GEMS? Go The Extra Mile Singapore? Was there really such a campaign that have gone on? Gone with the wind, perhaps... Such lousy service really put me off. Don't they know that I was a sincere buyer? Given the amt of time I have spent in the boutique and the compromise I was ready to make? They did not even offer any alternatives after telling me that they cannot accept Nets payment at that point in time. What would you have done if you were me?
Off I left. Without a word. Anyway, the sales girl was not expecting me to say anything (she was busy with her slips). Perhaps tkfully so I left without saying anything. If I have done so, that might have been an episode of me losing self-control, a fruit of the Spirit! Ok, God has better things in store for me. Or at least, I deserve better service, even as a shopper! Later, I realised that God knew I was not completely happy with the purchase (and the service), so He actually 'close the door' for me. Isn't He wonderful? I was pleasantly surprised to realise later that with the same amt I would have paid for that 2 pcs, I actually brought 3 pcs later, and I like them all! In fact, out of the 3 pcs, 2 were the type of clothing that I have been wanting to get. All 3 were on discount. God is good, amen?
And the Angel re-open the door, upon hearing the Password?
After buying the 3 pcs from Orchard, I went on the Plaza Sing, my last stop for the day, to get the discounted bedsheets. By then, my arms and hands were quite tired, having carried my bks and the shopping stuff for hours. Took the train to Dohby Ghaut. Would have been able to enter the train in time, had not the man in front block the walkway on the escalator with his bulky bag. Still, though I missed the door (yea, I tried to rushed in), I still give tks. Tk God, now, at least I won't have to compete for the chance to sit on those limited sitting area, whilst waiting for the next train! And I really have no idea that God is so near, that right after I gave tks (in my mind), the train doors, actually closed, reopened! Wow! I ran in! I am so dearly loved, that God is willing to hold the train (and all its passengers) just to let me catch this train... :p
I didn't manage to get the bedsheets in the end. A bit disappointed but it was fine. Have not expected that the shipman could be delayed, after all the advertising in their newsletters. Nevertheless, I remained happy, cos God has blessed me much! Now moving on after my studies, I have new goals to pursue!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Exam blues...
Hiya... been a while since i last update here... was actually reading some blogs then i thot, hmm... maybe it's high time i update mine too... Actually, blog is such a nice way of knowing what's going on in the lives of pple u care, as well as a good avenue to find similar-minded mates in terms of interests, etc. Still, nothing beats the personal touch of meet up or phone call. ok... am advertising for neither blog of teleco, ok? Muz clarify...
For the last 8 days, i have been 'imprisoned' at home for the sake of completing the last 'leg' of my degree race... Well, actually i did 'got out' over the wkend... but that's more to submit my assignment (which ate into my exam revision time) and well... to give myself some sanity break as well... after having worked so hard on my assignment! I'll be ashamed to disclose how long i took to finish that so i shall not say so :p
The reading of the text is quite dry. Nevertheless, am psych-ing myself to love it! After all, it's psychology I'm after. Certain topics, well, not that bad after all lar... I jus wish that i could progress faster... Ha.. i guess at the back of my mind, i am still harbouring hopes that i can 'go out' and do some stuff i have much earlier planned for during this long 1 and half wks of leave! now, it seems the risk is too high... better finish my revision safely first... the rest can wait... can't afford to wait another full year to finish my course if i don't clear this module!
Am taking a break from my reading on the laptop. Was in fact trying to load up the MCQ questions but again, it took too long that one begin to wonder if there's any virus coming on! *sigh* So, naturally, i went on to check out other stuff online ;) Only have to tell myself not to have 'over time' break... Am i too hard on myself? But really hate it that my progress is this slow.. :(
One last note, and this is a thanksgiving :) The reason i can blog at this hr is all thks to a laptop recently acquired at $800~ during a promotion. Yea, it's first hand and not the cannot-make-it type of model. In fact, am listening to online radio right now and the speakers work v well too ;) As some of you might know, yrs truly are not very well off, so part of the money that purchased this laptop actually came 'pre-maturely' from the progress package... Ha... what a way to promote votes... the Singaporean way... if fines work well, i guess it worked for votes as well!
Guess most of you don't know that in order to get this laptop, i have to queue up outside Courts early in the morning, even when the aircon is not on yet and the security guard is walking around... U can exclaim and laugh but i seriously have never thought i would do such a thing! The perils of 'poverty'! When i reach the spot, which is abt 3 hrs before opening time, i realised i was the 17th person in queue! Truly Singaporean... me newbie lar.. But gosh! The fact that each outlet has only 3 laptops to offer was definitely bad news to me then... I'm 17th in the queue! Nevertheless, i prayed (and sms 2 more persons to pray! hubby included of course, cos' he's the one who suggested getting the laptop) and sat myself down to read thru' the Sat's thick pile of newspapers. Have even bought my course bk to read + music to listen to... Never quite imagine that i could also be 'entertained' by the musings of others (kay-poh) in the queue. Heard 1 uncle (who seems to know everything and is kinda 'indian chief') that the first 3 persons actually came all the way from the Bt Timah outlet, which was already lined up with many the night before... Yea, I know Seng Kang is quite off location wise but, you mean they have started queuing since last night??? Unthinkable... and I sincerely hope i won't ever reach that stage!!
Some minor arguements even arose when other newbies tried to queue at the other end... when the queue has stretched to the opposite end (near escalator). Courts staff were asked to be involved in calming unnerved 'queue-ers'. I just 'kan si' aka. watch show, lar! In the end, it's still happy ending - those who try to cheat were told that the queue started at my direction. Hahaha!!! Aw-bee-good, uh! =p
And the happier ending is: I GOT THE LAPTOP!!!! I was the 2nd 'qualifying' person to buy the laptop, based on the numbered ticket given to me. Was somewhat amazed. Indeed it is God's intervention!
So, now i don't have to take shifts with my hubby in using internet or word processing stuff, since he often use it for his work purposes... u know, working on his quotations and emailing, and esp his design software, which slowed the system terribly!!! Now, we just have to move the modem here and there, depending on whose need to use internet is more justifiable ;) Don't worry, we don't fight over this :]
God is good :)
For the last 8 days, i have been 'imprisoned' at home for the sake of completing the last 'leg' of my degree race... Well, actually i did 'got out' over the wkend... but that's more to submit my assignment (which ate into my exam revision time) and well... to give myself some sanity break as well... after having worked so hard on my assignment! I'll be ashamed to disclose how long i took to finish that so i shall not say so :p
The reading of the text is quite dry. Nevertheless, am psych-ing myself to love it! After all, it's psychology I'm after. Certain topics, well, not that bad after all lar... I jus wish that i could progress faster... Ha.. i guess at the back of my mind, i am still harbouring hopes that i can 'go out' and do some stuff i have much earlier planned for during this long 1 and half wks of leave! now, it seems the risk is too high... better finish my revision safely first... the rest can wait... can't afford to wait another full year to finish my course if i don't clear this module!
Am taking a break from my reading on the laptop. Was in fact trying to load up the MCQ questions but again, it took too long that one begin to wonder if there's any virus coming on! *sigh* So, naturally, i went on to check out other stuff online ;) Only have to tell myself not to have 'over time' break... Am i too hard on myself? But really hate it that my progress is this slow.. :(
One last note, and this is a thanksgiving :) The reason i can blog at this hr is all thks to a laptop recently acquired at $800~ during a promotion. Yea, it's first hand and not the cannot-make-it type of model. In fact, am listening to online radio right now and the speakers work v well too ;) As some of you might know, yrs truly are not very well off, so part of the money that purchased this laptop actually came 'pre-maturely' from the progress package... Ha... what a way to promote votes... the Singaporean way... if fines work well, i guess it worked for votes as well!
Guess most of you don't know that in order to get this laptop, i have to queue up outside Courts early in the morning, even when the aircon is not on yet and the security guard is walking around... U can exclaim and laugh but i seriously have never thought i would do such a thing! The perils of 'poverty'! When i reach the spot, which is abt 3 hrs before opening time, i realised i was the 17th person in queue! Truly Singaporean... me newbie lar.. But gosh! The fact that each outlet has only 3 laptops to offer was definitely bad news to me then... I'm 17th in the queue! Nevertheless, i prayed (and sms 2 more persons to pray! hubby included of course, cos' he's the one who suggested getting the laptop) and sat myself down to read thru' the Sat's thick pile of newspapers. Have even bought my course bk to read + music to listen to... Never quite imagine that i could also be 'entertained' by the musings of others (kay-poh) in the queue. Heard 1 uncle (who seems to know everything and is kinda 'indian chief') that the first 3 persons actually came all the way from the Bt Timah outlet, which was already lined up with many the night before... Yea, I know Seng Kang is quite off location wise but, you mean they have started queuing since last night??? Unthinkable... and I sincerely hope i won't ever reach that stage!!
Some minor arguements even arose when other newbies tried to queue at the other end... when the queue has stretched to the opposite end (near escalator). Courts staff were asked to be involved in calming unnerved 'queue-ers'. I just 'kan si' aka. watch show, lar! In the end, it's still happy ending - those who try to cheat were told that the queue started at my direction. Hahaha!!! Aw-bee-good, uh! =p
And the happier ending is: I GOT THE LAPTOP!!!! I was the 2nd 'qualifying' person to buy the laptop, based on the numbered ticket given to me. Was somewhat amazed. Indeed it is God's intervention!
So, now i don't have to take shifts with my hubby in using internet or word processing stuff, since he often use it for his work purposes... u know, working on his quotations and emailing, and esp his design software, which slowed the system terribly!!! Now, we just have to move the modem here and there, depending on whose need to use internet is more justifiable ;) Don't worry, we don't fight over this :]
God is good :)
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Winn's updates
Friendship - such a fragile ship at times...
Lately, a friendship my good friend and I have shared with another friend has gone down the drain :( We threesome have known one another since our secondary school days.
After leaving school, one of us went on to poly; another went on to another poly then private school; this friend stayed on for another year in school, then later to private tertiary upgrade. Then, my good friend got hitched at age 21; she's the earliest one to get married among us three. Years later, I also got married.
We threesome used to meet up on one another's birthdays and occasions like CNY or X'mas or ad-hoc gatherings. However, this friend suddenly gave us the virtual cold shoulder i.e. never reply via email about updating or meeting up. I have thought that she was busy. This friend of ours can be quite 'inconsistent' at times; my good friend and I felt weird about it but have got used to this aspect of her.
However, this time, the verdict is really bad! One day, she sms-ed us that her hp no. would be changed soon and would update us her new no. by a certain date. I thought it was one of those mass informed smses. So, I waited... and waited... past the said date... Still no update? So, I sms-ed back to ask for update. Still no reply =(
My good friend and I were puzzled by her behaviour. She called her up. Apparently, the feel my good friend got was that she was trying to avoid her. Her mom said she was "not at home". I tried calling her a few times but can't reach her as well -> "not at home"
So, since she lives so near me, I purposefully dropped by to visit. She was there! Cordial but somewhat distanced as we talked. I brought up the subject of her avoidance. She, not surprisingly, denied so. I updated that our good friend is pregnant! She expressed pleasant surprise and asked about how our good friend was adjusting. Hmm... We talked about other stuff and at some points, it sounded just like old times when we chatted.
The following night, both my good friend and I received a nasty sms from her. In her sms, she said she was sick of us and told us (me) not to suddenly appear at her place. I remember though, that she wrote about wanting to be left alone "for the time being". It was near Christmas then.
So we did. We were upset that she refuse to tell us what went wrong. Was it something we have done or said? Let us know! At least we know how to improve! It's a friendship of 18 years! How can we let go of it so easily?
We did not dare to venture in yet... During the CNY period, I dropped a card at her place. Meant to insert it in her mailbox but alas! it was locked! No choice got to hand deliver up. The door was opened but it was too great a risk for me to turn up 'unsolicitated' again - if you know what I mean! I knew it was not exactly nice but I have no choice but to leave the card at the doorstep...
So, that was it. Neither of us have hear any news from her. Sometimes, as I have told my good friend, I wish I could bump into her mother while doing marketing near her block and find out what's with her...
Lately, a friendship my good friend and I have shared with another friend has gone down the drain :( We threesome have known one another since our secondary school days.
After leaving school, one of us went on to poly; another went on to another poly then private school; this friend stayed on for another year in school, then later to private tertiary upgrade. Then, my good friend got hitched at age 21; she's the earliest one to get married among us three. Years later, I also got married.
We threesome used to meet up on one another's birthdays and occasions like CNY or X'mas or ad-hoc gatherings. However, this friend suddenly gave us the virtual cold shoulder i.e. never reply via email about updating or meeting up. I have thought that she was busy. This friend of ours can be quite 'inconsistent' at times; my good friend and I felt weird about it but have got used to this aspect of her.
However, this time, the verdict is really bad! One day, she sms-ed us that her hp no. would be changed soon and would update us her new no. by a certain date. I thought it was one of those mass informed smses. So, I waited... and waited... past the said date... Still no update? So, I sms-ed back to ask for update. Still no reply =(
My good friend and I were puzzled by her behaviour. She called her up. Apparently, the feel my good friend got was that she was trying to avoid her. Her mom said she was "not at home". I tried calling her a few times but can't reach her as well -> "not at home"
So, since she lives so near me, I purposefully dropped by to visit. She was there! Cordial but somewhat distanced as we talked. I brought up the subject of her avoidance. She, not surprisingly, denied so. I updated that our good friend is pregnant! She expressed pleasant surprise and asked about how our good friend was adjusting. Hmm... We talked about other stuff and at some points, it sounded just like old times when we chatted.
The following night, both my good friend and I received a nasty sms from her. In her sms, she said she was sick of us and told us (me) not to suddenly appear at her place. I remember though, that she wrote about wanting to be left alone "for the time being". It was near Christmas then.
So we did. We were upset that she refuse to tell us what went wrong. Was it something we have done or said? Let us know! At least we know how to improve! It's a friendship of 18 years! How can we let go of it so easily?
We did not dare to venture in yet... During the CNY period, I dropped a card at her place. Meant to insert it in her mailbox but alas! it was locked! No choice got to hand deliver up. The door was opened but it was too great a risk for me to turn up 'unsolicitated' again - if you know what I mean! I knew it was not exactly nice but I have no choice but to leave the card at the doorstep...
So, that was it. Neither of us have hear any news from her. Sometimes, as I have told my good friend, I wish I could bump into her mother while doing marketing near her block and find out what's with her...
Thursday, March 09, 2006
I've been promoted! - to an Aunty!
Ha! It may sound a bit old to be called Aunty but I'm happily awaiting my newly arrived niece to call me so!!
Baby Angel arrived on Jan 11th at Mt Alvernia at 8.10pm (or so). Indeed, it was God's answered prayer for my sis who kept reminding me 'uth'-less time to pray for a painless childbirth process. Yes, a friend has read a book on this written by a Christian author and yea, she could testified that her 2nd delivery was painless! My sis did not look out for the book at Christian bookstores nevertheless *sigh*
Anyway, she was admitted at 4+pm and ta-da! after 10 minutes of real pushing, the baby is out! Not bad for a first time delivery! My bro-in-law kept saying the baby is very cute and that once the doc turned her over to face all the eyes above watching, baby Angel's eyes immediately opened! Quite a bit of hair also. Didn't cried much too; just a bit of baby typical cry 'oh-er'. Easy baby? as what my sis always prayed for??
Though I call her Angel, her registered Christian name is Angela. The mother (yea, my sis) is concerned that she may be teased at by friends when she grow up in future. Angel was in fact the preferred name my sis thought of. Still, it's the parents' call :) It was interesting that my bro-in-law initially wanted her to be named 'Mary'. Their surname is 'Looi'.... Sounds like marrying $?? A prophecy??!? My sis-in-law is also called Mary. Anyway, I'm thankful for Angel or Angela :p
It's cute to play with Angel but, ha... as many have said this and I am in total agreement: taking care is another whole new ball game! I'm happy to have my free time now. Can't imagine at this point to give up the luxury of waking up late, doing my reading, watching TV, etc. Friends have always asked "So, when's your turn?" My reply is always: "I can't hold the baby with 1 arm and the other arm my textbook! Either one of them will die or I, myself to go first!" Well, this study-after-office-hours reason will be invalid soon after I complete my degree in mid-yr (by His grace!). Still, it's important to have sound financial ground before having an addition in the family. J and I have recently went to a 3rd place for our 2nd year honeymoon. Wedding honeymoon was Bali; last yr was KL Sunway Lagoon with Sam Hui's concert; recently we went to Bangkok, yes, shopping paradise indeed! (Have never shopped to the extent of my feet having sudden sharp pains! Was actually limping slightly during the last days there!)There is still (at least) one more place I would like to go before I settle for motherhood... Australia!
Well, we'll see...
Baby Angel arrived on Jan 11th at Mt Alvernia at 8.10pm (or so). Indeed, it was God's answered prayer for my sis who kept reminding me 'uth'-less time to pray for a painless childbirth process. Yes, a friend has read a book on this written by a Christian author and yea, she could testified that her 2nd delivery was painless! My sis did not look out for the book at Christian bookstores nevertheless *sigh*
Anyway, she was admitted at 4+pm and ta-da! after 10 minutes of real pushing, the baby is out! Not bad for a first time delivery! My bro-in-law kept saying the baby is very cute and that once the doc turned her over to face all the eyes above watching, baby Angel's eyes immediately opened! Quite a bit of hair also. Didn't cried much too; just a bit of baby typical cry 'oh-er'. Easy baby? as what my sis always prayed for??
Though I call her Angel, her registered Christian name is Angela. The mother (yea, my sis) is concerned that she may be teased at by friends when she grow up in future. Angel was in fact the preferred name my sis thought of. Still, it's the parents' call :) It was interesting that my bro-in-law initially wanted her to be named 'Mary'. Their surname is 'Looi'.... Sounds like marrying $?? A prophecy??!? My sis-in-law is also called Mary. Anyway, I'm thankful for Angel or Angela :p
It's cute to play with Angel but, ha... as many have said this and I am in total agreement: taking care is another whole new ball game! I'm happy to have my free time now. Can't imagine at this point to give up the luxury of waking up late, doing my reading, watching TV, etc. Friends have always asked "So, when's your turn?" My reply is always: "I can't hold the baby with 1 arm and the other arm my textbook! Either one of them will die or I, myself to go first!" Well, this study-after-office-hours reason will be invalid soon after I complete my degree in mid-yr (by His grace!). Still, it's important to have sound financial ground before having an addition in the family. J and I have recently went to a 3rd place for our 2nd year honeymoon. Wedding honeymoon was Bali; last yr was KL Sunway Lagoon with Sam Hui's concert; recently we went to Bangkok, yes, shopping paradise indeed! (Have never shopped to the extent of my feet having sudden sharp pains! Was actually limping slightly during the last days there!)There is still (at least) one more place I would like to go before I settle for motherhood... Australia!
Well, we'll see...
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